Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue_Bird
Thank you nammu  I am unsure if I will ever know for sure, but I think you're right that if I ever had it I definitely worked hard to overcome it, or at least the really troublesome symptoms of it, I did do a lot of work over the years in therapy and on my own just to not act on impulses, and stuff like that, not act on every emotion. Nothing specific oriented towards BPD because I was never diagnosed with it that I know of, but I guess I either grew out of it if I ever did have it or all the work I did with therapy, CBT etc has really paid off. I did work really hard to reign in my reckless behavior. I haven't done any of that stuff in 10 years and have stayed out of the hospital since 2017. So I guess that's a good sign.
I am just starting to work on dealing with past trauma though these past two weeks, I guess that is why it's bringing up negative emotions inside. But I'm still not acting on any impulses or doing anything reckless. |
I agree with Nammu that the traditional characterization of BPD you may not fit, but I will open up to a story. She's very much true about the mimicking effects of PTSD as well. I was diagnosed with BPD this year and I was at first at odds with the diagnosis. I thought "I don't know..." but we went through the criteria and there are nuanced ways it can manifest and most people, with or without help, tend to get a bit more stable as they age. I will try to find a link to some examples of how it may manifest in a more quiet way, and less of a dramatic way. I had a really nice article a few years back -- just give me some time and I'll send you a PM. Either way, the fact you just are seeking help and just want the best treatment to deal with all your issues is courageous. Some people, like me, sometimes just submit to the idea that "I will suffer". Don't give into that mentality-- you deserve happiness and looking at these aspects that are a bit harder are very important. Keep your chin up.
P.S. BPD isn't a death sentence either -- It has a bad rep and stigma, but when you look into utilizing skills and learning coping mechanisms... you really can be in a better place.