@Blue_Bird I've looked and looked for that article but couldn't find it. You mentioned Quiet BPD -- that's definitely something to consider and is similar to what I am talking about, but technically isn't the same thing. This article just gave a very interesting kind of picture each criteria can look in a variety of personalites, for example, how say, "no clear sense of self" may look". It may be that you tend to change your core beliefs depending on those you're around and maybe seemingly at a whim... but more modestly, it may mean you tend to act in ways that contrast with the things you think/feel without really understanding why you do. For example, I have very strong opinions about promiscuity and reckless behaviors yet I can attest I have landed myself in situations that I definitely should be ashamed to be in holding the opinions that I do. An ill-defined sense of self can look a lot of different ways, for example, and doesn't necessarily have to be a straightforward process. That's just the one example I remember going through with my therapist and from that article I read. I hope I explained that clear-ish enough. I'm trying to save myself some embarrassment of going into detail of a personal experience to explain the concept lol.

Also, I was thinking about when you talk to your doctor/therapist -- I think if they are a good one, they will be very happy to see you invested in trying to find the best options and resources to help yourself. They have the expertise of course, but you have your experiences and wishes to help guide that as well. I think it shouldn't be underestimated it takes courage to advocate for yourself, and also very therapeutic to have a team that will respond positively to you proactively and seriously discussing treatment plans and patient education of disorders.

Anyway, I feel I wasn't very clear but I hope it made things a bit clearer than I left it before. Feel free to PM me if you have questions or want to know a bit more.


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Brentus.