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Dec 30, 2022, 09:27 PM
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Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Mid World
Posts: 18,084
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Quote:
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But they have completely destroyed their own life to the point of imminent homelessness/death, I appear to be quite literally all they have left, and I don't know how to carry that burden without making my own mental health worse, and I need help. It would destroy me if anything happened to them. I just don't know how to walk this tightrope.
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You already said it, you can't carry this burden. This person is actively making choices that will bring them harm. I sure understand wanting to "save" them. Spent most of my life trying to save people i cared for. The reality is we can not do it for them and we risk getting pulled down into the muck and the mire with them.
As hard as it is I would strongly encourage you to take a couple of giant steps backward emotionally. In addictions care it's tough love. We have to step back and let the person face consequences for what they've done. Is it hard? Oh heck yes! Is it painful? Again, yes. But you can't carry the burden for them. They have to do that themselves.
Good luck to you hon. 
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