I can't offer any specific advice as I'm not in the same boat as you are.
The only thing I found ever worked for me, is when I do end up triggered, I'd force myself to physically freeze for literally a minute. I'd then think about what had happened and why. I appreciate this is not a thing that is do-able by everyone and I am fortunate to have that ability.
The way I got to that is emotions are the reaction to something, not the thing itself, and I'd rationalise my way out of it and then deal with the cause rather than the effect... Again I'm aware this may not be do-able for you.
I hope you find something soon that works for you.