Go ahead and move this if this is the wrong forum...I think it is a communication issue but I'm not really sure...

Anyway, hi, I just need to dump a bunch of crap that's been seriously bothering me, and I have no one to discuss it with...it's really personal and if it's too personal I don't care if anyone deletes it...

Anyway. My dad's whole side of the family has totally abandoned me since my younger sister had a kid. She was totally irresponsible and got drunk and slept with 2 random dudes in one night and got knocked up. She decided to keep it and now everyone treats her like the Madonna or something. The baby has Down's and I know that is hard to deal with and she is pretty young, only 19. Before he was born my dad and her mother (who was my stepmother and abused me terribly when I was a kid) DEMANDED that I support her, which I did, although I didn't really want to. Yeah, I'm a terrible person, evil, I know. Honestly I was just afraid of losing my dad's love. Which I did anyway.

The thing is, I am still not over my horrible childhood. I'm 25, I know I should just move on, but it haunts me. And she played such a huge role in my suffering, I know she is younger than me and she was just a kid and whatnot...her mom is the woman our dad cheated on MY mom with, he married her because she got pregnant and he had to "do the right thing". After my sister was born my life became Hell. Her mom tried to keep me away from my dad AND my mom, she punished me constantly, they always sided with my sister, I was never allowed to do normal things, I always had to drag my sister along, never allowed to have friends over, or pursue my interests (like dance class) unless it was something my sister was also involved in- anyway, enough *****ing, the point is, she was the obvious favorite child, even neighbors from that time who I barely spoke to have told me they noticed the difference in the way we were treated.

So I have been as supportive as I can, but it is getting near impossible because I am not getting any support in return. I guess I should just be selfless and suck up my own problems, but I feel like complete %#@&#! most of the time. Yesterday she called me to talk about the baby again and when I expressed misgivings about some stupid thing, she blew up at me and hung up. I was deliberately very gentle and non-accusing about it. I simply disagreed. Then she texts me and says not to contact her ever again unless I can "accept the way she parents her child and admit she's an adult". This is not the first time. Everyone showers her with gifts and praise for being so strong and so mature...but she threw a temper tantrum at me. And my dad hasn't even tried to contact me in over 6 months.

Am I the one in the wrong? I can accept that, I just don't know what to do. Keep my opinions to myself, I guess?

This really hurts because my extended family is really close, but since she has a kid and I don't, they see her as more "adult" and listen to whatever bile she spits about me. When I try to defend myself, I'm seen as a whiner at best and crazy at worst. I've been silently dealing with this for months now, I'm getting professional help, but it's slow, and in the meantime I just need to vent and advice wuld be awesome.

Thanks.