God bless you, with all my heart, dear wonderful willowtigger! I have him in my past, too. And the fear & memories may never go away. But please keep trying to find freedom from the past, dear wonderful friend. .... How am I coping today? How am I able to get through this? Maybe, probably really good, blessed genes, & also from the influence of some really wonderful people I have known throughout my life, whom I continue to give thanks to God for always.