(((lostandlonely))) God hasn't abandoned you, hon, but it does seem that you aren't able to hear Him right now.

Your depression is quite evident in your post, complete with false conclusions and negative thinking.
Comparing yourself to anyone else, or any other situation will always get you into mental health trouble, imo.

Please seek couseling. Talking with a psychologist who understands the spiritual needs of a person will also help you realize that it isn't God you are angry with, really. (But in the meantime, you can be angry at Him, He can handle it. It isn't in your own best interest though, as you are shutting out one Power Who can truly help you.)

Life happens. It takes work to get through it happily.