(((((((resolved)))))))))

I have fallen out out of love with my husband more than once, so I know what your wife is saying when she speaks those words. My husband and I are separated as well right now, and what I've told him all along is that if he put as much effort into being a good husband as he has put into being a good father, we probably wouldn't have the issues we have right now.

What would have saved my marriage from the brink each and every time? COMMUNICATION!!!! So often, when we were going through the rough times (we had our first son early in our marriage too, before we were done just being a couple), he would internalize his feelings rather that sharing them with me. It became a marriage of what "he" was going through, and what "I" was going through, not what "we" were going through. I tried so hard to bring him back to the friendship we once had, but he really lost his way, and started doing other things that were extremely destructive to our relationship. It hurt so much to be living with someone who had essentially became a stranger. But as anyone will tell yo, a relationship takes two people to make it work, and two people need to be doing the work. I felt like he expected me to carry the emotional weight, and not only did I fall out of love with him, I started to resent the heck out of him.

We are currently separated, but are living together because I am just about to have our third child (5 more sleeps, yay!). He is FINALLY working with a counsellor who is teaching him how to communicated better, and we are rebuilding a friendship....slowly. I don't know if our marriage can be repaired, but I know I love him and will do anything to try and help him become a better person.

Anytime you need a shoulder, please feel free to PM me. I have come to understand that it is sometimes so hard for a husband to talk to his wife about his feelings, and speaking from the love and support I've received on this site, I can say that all of us here are more than willing to listen if you wish to express yours!

Good luck to you and your wife.