*** trigger warning***

Today in my session with T we discussed my fear of what people would think of me if they knew my past. We actually talked about this last week but continued the discussion today. I told her that I feared people would think I wanted the abuse I endured as a young teen. So they would think I was a slut. i told her of another incident
That happened about the same time as my CSA. She is the only person I have ever told about this. She told me that what happened in the other jncidence was not me being a slut but rather I was r@8ed. This sent me into a dark space. I ever thought of it as r@8e. It makes me feel even dirtier than ever before.

I just want to give up I cannot tolerate the psin..

[TRIGGER][/TRIGGER]