I shared about what has challenged me because I noticed how the trend is to describing people as abusers and toxic because it’s easier to get into that black and white when it may not be intentional manipulation or abuse.

I can definitely get triggered and angry and frustrated because my husband had both ADHD and dyslexia and his presence can feel intrusive and loud and impulsive and impatient. Talking to him about things that bother me can get frustrating because of his impatience and lack of being able to hear me the way I want.

I have also been around individuals that have ADD and their attention is slow and they too can not hear all of what you want. I usually end up making lists and let them go at their pace. It’s not a question of intelligence but instead ability to pay attention the way one expects.

I know for myself that because I have had extreme boundary violations that resulted in trauma and loss that my husbands intrusive loud behaviors can trigger my to react physically and getting my hypervigilant and my body producing cortisol leaving me all wound up and then very tired.