I don't know where else to share my feelings.... I think it's been a while since I wrote anything in the Bipolar check in thread, but maybe I'll start.

I've been trying to wait for this med change to kick in, but so far, I'm feeling worse than before. It's only been a week, but I'm having a very difficult time coping in the meantime and not really sure what to do. My next pdoc visit is on 2/8, and I don't know whether it is worth calling her before then only to hear that I need to give the medication time. I am having a very difficult time at work. My anxiety is really bad. For a while I felt for the lack of a better word, "activated," or maybe a little hypomanic with anxiety. Now, depression is starting to set in with the anxiety. I just had a crying spell and felt worse than I have in a long time. Some unsafe thoughts, but I have a plan to talk to someone instead of acting on them. I am feeling bad about myself and starting to feel hopeless and unable to find pleasure in the things I used to. This is all happening so fast.

I really wish everyone well here and hope you don't mind if I need to vent