Thank you very much for your kind words.

The thing is I am really tired. I am close to alone in this. Her son doesn't leave in the country anymore, while I am trying to keep mum safe, so when it all started, I've talked with the staff there to keep just me posted when things are bad, so I can tell my mum.

But I am exhausted and feeling I am cracking up.
We speak daily with the stuff there, visit once per week, but every word she is saying to me feels like a bullet. Yesterday she asked for me, they told her I am at work and she replied: He can't be at work, he is just a kid.
A small phrase that did so much damage in me.