Quote:
Originally Posted by nottrustin
*** trigger warning***
Today in my session with T we discussed my fear of what people would think of me if they knew my past. We actually talked about this last week but continued the discussion today. I told her that I feared people would think I wanted the abuse I endured as a young teen. So they would think I was a slut. i told her of another incident
That happened about the same time as my CSA. She is the only person I have ever told about this. She told me that what happened in the other jncidence was not me being a slut but rather I was r@8ed. This sent me into a dark space. I ever thought of it as r@8e. It makes me feel even dirtier than ever before.
I just want to give up I cannot tolerate the psin..
[TRIGGER][/TRIGGER]
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I know what you mean about feeling dirty and to blame. No one ever wants abuse. Being r**** doesn't make you dirty; it makes the abuser a piece of crap. Nothing you did makes you wrong.
I was blamed for my r*** and that pain won't go away. My own mother said I must have done something to encourage it.
I hope you can see yourself as a good person deserving of compassion.
