he sent me another couple of messages this morning.

"i hope your life is exactly how you dreamt it to be without me in it all those years."

"Actually no. that would mean you were getting exactly what you wanted. So, i hope you huff and puff, be disappointed, dissatisfied, envious of your successful friends, etc. random emoji."

I finally wrote back this evening asking me why he is sending me these messages, is he trying to bait me into defending myself.

he said " i dont care one bit. it was for me."

i said "so you can pretend i did you wrong. and insult me in the process. i don't appreciate you lashing out at me calling me manipulative and being inflammatory. insulting me several times. even talking about [moms pervert husband]."

so far no response and he probably wont say anything to that. too reasonable. too normal.

at least i hope my messages were reasonable? i could block him or tell him to f off but i feel better keeping the line a bit open and clean as possible since we have kids and property.

I tried not to engage, but i had like an ulcer today from his messages. my stomach was burning and i was feeling other bad body feelings. and i was having trouble concentrating. i looked up the body symptoms i was having and it seems like it was fear. i dont want to be afraid of him. i dont want to live my life in fear. i think i have been on edge all weekend from his messages. i had to say something.