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*Beth* · Feb 09, 2023, 02:01 PM

Thank you, and a hug to you, too,

M. often describes herself as "a hugger," yet once before she made a negative comment about my hugging her. I was stung then, too, since it was she who initiated hugging at the end of sessions. I'm thinking that today I will suggest we suspend hugging for a while. I'm hurt, but I'm also angry at her. I've posted here at least 4 times about what I feel are M.'s double standards. Seems that every time I feel things are going well in therapy with her, she throws a curve ball (an odd comment) and I'm feeling like...Iiii'm not sure about this again.....

....(he even shared once that his sister-in-law asked his wife, after several years in the family, whether it was OK to give him a hug because he seemed so closed off).

Ooh, *ouch* Interesting thing for a family member to say about about her BIL, who is a therapist

I'm sorry you had the "I love you" incident with your t. Yes, they are only human, but ya know....they have chosen a profession that puts them above being "only human" in many ways. Similar to a first grade teacher, really, in that they are working with some extremely powerful, very young, memories and feelings. Not a lot of room for screwing up.

I agree with you on the video subject. She said she wants to "watch it together" which, for some reason, makes me feel demeaned (childish, I know, but I have a 'red flag' feeling...maybe because she brought up the video when she totally misunderstood my email, thinking I was threatening suicide - I'm still shaking my head over that). I want to know more about the video, what it's about. Seems I could watch it on my own, possibly.

I'm going to the session today to, hopefully, clarify some things - the primary one being that I would never threaten suicide to manipulate anyone, which I would expect her to know by now.

I hope there's some good music on the radio during my drive to the clinic