My husband and I are both having job trouble. I am on medical leave because I've lost my voice, and I work in a call center. Getting long term disability approved has been a nightmare. They keep asking for the same forms over and over and over and over, despite the fact that these forms have been submitted numerous times. My doctor referred me to speech therapy, but apparently it's going to take an act of Congress to get those people to return my calls and schedule an appointment. I had messaged my doctor to get the number to the speech therapist, since they hadn't contacted me after the referral was approved. That was Monday. Today is Friday. And my doctor's office never replied to the message. I had to call them, difficult as it is for me to speak, and get the number. Then I called the speech therapist for an appointment, and of course I had to leave a message. I wonder how long it's going to take to call me back.

(Before anybody asks, I don't qualify for SSI because of my husband's income. Furthermore, we just found out that if his income dropped and I did get SSI, we wouldn't be allowed to both own a car. We can only have one vehicle between us. So SSI is out of the question.)

Meanwhile, my husband hates his job and has been looking for another one. I can't blame him. His boss is an idiot. Besides, the job takes him away from home for days at a time, and I'm left here with no support to help me deal with my own problems. He calls me at least two or three times a day, but what does he do when he calls? Dumps all his job drama on me, that's what. As if I don't have enough job drama of my own, he expects me to carry all of his, too. I've asked him to stop dumping it on me because I can't handle it, but he refuses to do so. Every time he calls, it's nothing but his job, his job, his job, his job. Not even a "How are you doing?" addressed to me.

So today I jumped in and told him what's going on with me. I told him how stretched to the end I feel, going through all this, how it's frustrating to keep being asked for the same forms we've already submitted, and how nobody is returning my calls. Bear in mind, the longer it takes to get help for this problem, the longer I cannot work. I told him how crazy it's driving me, to constantly be shoved on the back burner in life.

His response: A pause, followed by, "So anyway....." and he goes right back to talking about his job. When I protested, "Well, I thought you were finished."

Hello? Feedback? Empathy? Kiss my behind? Anything? I was finally able to pry a "Yeah, that sucks" out of him, but I might as well have been pulling teeth.

They wonder why I "freak out," as some call it, and my thoughts turn to SH.

This is why. I feel like it's the only way I can get anybody to pay attention to my needs. I can't just politely ask for help, and reasonably expect to get it, like everybody else does. I have to be all the way at the end of my rope, about to lose it completely, before my needs matter.

I don't know what to do anymore.