To clarify, is there no physical contact as a result of your infidelity, or did the lack of intimacy begin before you were unfaithful? I ask because an infidelity is MOST difficult to get past. Some people can, and many people cannot. So, if the lack of affection is due to the infidelity, then it will be very hard to get your marriage back on track. But if it began before then, there may be a chance through couples therapy. And why can't you separate/divorce?