There's a quote that L and I use that goes something like "But dear one, you don't have to be perfect to feel safe". She also tells me all the time that my job is to show up, pay my fees, come as I am, and stick to our commitments (always have one last session, use my safety plan, and always wait to hear from her before hurting myself).

Personally, I think you should put it all out there, upfront, and honest. Both T and L appreciated it when I did it. Both knew what they were getting into. L said that when she read my summary of what I deal with and what I'm needing help with, my honesty attracted her to me and she not only wanted to work with me, she CHOSE me.

If you want a T who can help you with relational attachment, tell them upfront. If you want to process your relationship with Dr. T, tell them upfront. If you want emails or touch, tell them... You want to know right away if it scares or worries them. If it does, then it will probably never work out. Better to know before you start developing an attachment.