I am also a person of faith. However I refuse to believe that G-d places women into bad situations so they can learn that they need men to survive, especially abusive and unfaithful men . No way.

I believe G-d gives us choice. Choices to make wise moves and choices to repeat mistakes and learn lessons. Believing that G-d really wants us to make unhealthy choices is kind of a dangerous thing because that’s how people justify abuse and some really horrible things. Is it easy to leave? Heck no. Could you choose to stay. Of course. No one can and no one should stop you.

But loneliness isn’t the best reason to stay with abuser. You really need to expand your life. I don’t know how long you lived in your state but it sounds that you don’t know anyone and have no one to talk to. Except some questionable people. I’d make an effort to make friends in the area. Girlfriends. At least one. Wholesome people.

I sometimes dated men because I had no friends at the time. I made a big change making sure it never happens again. You can certainly do it

Bottom line if you want to go back to your husband, of course you could. But just give it some more thoughts. Not be guided by addiction to romance and excitement (which never lasts) but by deep thought if this is the marriage you want.