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Originally Posted by RollercoasterLover
I'm wondering if you would be open to speaking to your pastor (or whoever your religious advisor is)? From my perspective, you need answers to questions you can't answer on your own. I've faced a similar challenge and found finding answers about faith to be helpful.
I have my perspective on your current situation based on my own experiences. Is it possible that this abusive, narcissistic, manipulative person is in your path and a major temptation when you are stressed, because you are supposed to change your path just enough to go around him? That you are supposed to find out how to deal with all these things in a different way than you used in the past? Those choices led you back to here, so it seems like you need to do things differently to no longer be stuck in this pattern. That's just my perspective.
What do you have to lose to talk to a pastor? It's free, it's confidential, and you will feel less alone. That may be enough to start small changes for the better for you.
You deserve to be fully happy, not just sometimes happy trying to connect bits of times together where happiness didn't last.
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That’s an excellent excellent idea. I didn’t think of that. It’s perfect. About pastor
I know it’s not the same situation, as it’s not divorce but losing a spouse to death, but when my late son in law passed unexpectedly, my daughter’s rabbi was a tremendous help to her as finding a therapist in a hurry was too much. In fact her temple was a huge help for all of us and for her for several years after. Not only her rabbi but a social group she had there. She and her husband (she married second time 5 years later) now belong to a different synagogue as they live in a different area, and new rabbi is excellent. But I can never forget those people and their help in need
Pastor/priest/rabbi are there for times like this. But also other people you might meet there. Support group or social group, maybe even divorce support group. Whatever denomination you belong to. And maybe that’s a good time to check out churches if you don’t normally go. Religious institutions provide great sense of community and not only in a sense of faith.
The only reason I mention all that is because you said you are a believer. I’d never suggest that randomly