Alec here, age 60. Actually this post is about hormones as I am editing it now. Getting into gender therapy and getting prescribed female hormones have been a couple of positive situations that happened because of the pandemic which allowed me the time alone, space and online access to therapy while being able to explore my gender by participating in transgender groups on Zoom.
My current status is that I was able to get prescribed estrogen back in August. Was able to get a referral to a doctor who prescribed. My gender therapist encouraged me to start hormones. I guess she felt this would really test my resolve to see if I was a true trans person. I was reluctant at first, waited about a year, started in August. Stayed on them for two months. Fear and depression and mood swings from being on them and side effects I decided to micro dose and ultimately quit after two months. In January I restarted the hormones, taking full dosage, knowing what to expect and more used to and adjusted to the changes. The estrogen is addicting in the way that it makes me feel calmer and more at peace with myself. I just fear the day still when I will become fearful of the outside world. I know that transition is supposed to happen from the inside out and not the other way around and at times it can feel like I am doing it backwards but I am far from passable, I need to lose a lot of weight and take better care of myself.