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Nammu · Feb 27, 2023, 12:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rosi700

I am on my way out for the walk. I have done a lot of thinking since my last input here.

CBT is not so simple as many think (I acknowledge others the right to have other favorite therapies, but I want to appreciate this approach for myself). I was on my way out of depression some weeks ago when, as I have already told, somebody figuratively "smashed my face" by telling me that CBT is too simplistic.

If someone becomes bored by reading this, just jump over it.

When CBT is successfully done one shall be able to recognise possible triggers, and then at the same time avoid an emotional experience or at least it will help to not let the episode become too strong.

I think, since I wasn't able to see "the smashing" as a trigger, it was because it was an unexpected trigger and I was at that point very weak (little energy because of a physical illness) plus that I have tendencies to feel down in the darkest of the winter months. (I have read more about CBT; Now with the purpose to try to diagnose what happened to me some weeks ago and I think the way I described it above is the real thruth. If one wants to use CBT one has to be honest to oneself).

Back to the "The feeling of not having accomplished what I wanted is still with me". That postulate is only part true. I can see that now. In my grown up life I have been a mother (grandchildren at Uni now), I have had good grades at Uni myself and I have worked as some sort of a counsellor. I cannot call that for "not coping".

I am older now (closer to 75 than to 70) and I have the capacity to work for only a couple of hours a week (and that has economical conequenses for me). For the time being I don't work at all because of the relapse. But so it is to become older, especially if one has to battle depressions with some "light ups" at the same time, grieve because the loss of husband and best friend and more.

It is nothing to be ashamed of. I know I am ranting, but it means so much to me to be able to see the whole picture before I try to go on with my life.

I think I found the right platform to move on from. I have a chronic disorder that I have to take into consideration. I cannot expect to be clever at see in advance triggers all the time, but I need to be more clever forgiving myself for not seeing such...

Well, it is still winter. I have to dress for my walk outside.

I’m older too, though younger by 8- 10 years or so. CBT was used for me too and I found it helpful. Rant away. This is a good place to let off steam.