Today has been a super good day for me.

I woke up really late though - Got out of bed at 3pm. I took the 60mg of Vyvanse + 20mg of Dexedrine, then the other 20mg an hour later - Good focus.

I've managed to be a little productive, enjoying the day......

I want to get back into reading books. Starting to meditate - Is such a big deal, so difficult... It's just that I wish the world wasn't like this...

Just wondering, "Is there a future?" - And I guess I could adapt, and go somewhere... Ask people for help (Money, etc..) and do anything... I hate how I'm an empath, and hate to see other people suffering so much... I want to do something about it too + Learn, have fun...

No psychosis (Apart from the CSIS burning my brain in my dreams like a CD) - And then find out that they are releasing information recently about the Canadian PM.. It's basically the "Canadian CIA".

And all of this stuff is weird to me - Interesting... Like listening to journalists about corruption and deep, deep conspiracies.. I just want to know truth etc.. Find the deepest meaning to how things work - Cuz meaning is all around me... Hyper fixating on it + "novelty", like being at a carnival.. And it's basically what I'm preparing for (With DMT) - The deepest dream of all dreams in reality.

I do this to myself.. idk why. But I'll figure it out. And listening to JBP (About getting my life together etc... It helps - He seems to me, undeniably like, a modern prophet - Him and "Sadhguru" etc .. ), all of these people.. Finding meaning, putting it all together (With my very low IQ)