I appreciate the reply.

Mentally, I'm usually ok dealing with challenging situations, but this one has been tricky because I don't have anyone to talk to about it. The work-load of two small children keeps me from regularly contacting friends and family, and when I do manage to talk to them it's difficult to discuss this issue because my wife could be within ear-shot.

But it's more practical advice that I'm interested in. I can't imagine approaching her about a diagnosis - overall she'd likely be better off not knowing. But there are issues - maybe, as you say, the best I can do is work on it issue by issue and hope she manages to learn / change.