I, too, was terrified of taking meds - felt I'd be ruined for life even for trying one. Now that I'm on my 7th week of Lexapro, I told my doc I don't want off at 3 months (as was planned), told her why, and she agreed with me. She also said she has so many samples, I can just have them (since I was worried about cost). Lexapro helps with both anxiety and depression and helped me stop doing self injury because it lessened the triggers.
Kiya