Hey Kit,
First I want to own that I have only read your posts in this thread due to my own drama.

I am so sorry you are going through this. It is not fair or right. If you cannot have a different relationship with ex T than the therapeutic one then she needs to have the self discipline to hold her end of the boundary. That has been a huge theme in my world right now... needing to hold people accountable for their side of the boundary.

I am glad that new T seems to be able to offer support and clarity through all of this.

What has helped me in similar situations recently is becoming even more clear on where MY boundary is... even with Awesome T and his retirement... where are my boundaries with all of it and as much as I hate it... what do I need from him, from the relationship, from our work together.

Hang in there.