Quote:
Originally Posted by sadmanagain
Greetings all
I'm really in a tough place at the moment and am seeking some wisdom and support . Feeling really low .
My wife and I have been married for over 28 years. We had our ups and downs over the years, had a close call with a near divorce years ago mostly due to my issues and partially due to hers . We both got individual therapy reconciled/relocated and restarted our lives and today she suggested that it might be better for both of us if we divorced as she was not sure we could any longer provide each other what we needed emotionally . She explained she wants to work something out amicably without any lawyers in a way that minimally hurts either or us financially .
She says she is a wounded soul and I shouldn't have to be with someone with her struggles . I love her so very much and am happy to face those challenges. I suggested marriage counseling but she says she's not sure if she can do that and will have to give it some thought. I am far from perfect and fail at times to show the right emotional support but neither does she (which she readily admits)
I am hopeful that things can be figured out and we can save this but I am devastated and to be honest terrified about the concept of loosing who I thought was my soulmate and best friend . I am also terrified of living alone after having a partner by my side for almost 3 decades to face life's challenges with.
I don't know how I will deal with the loss of such a big part of my life or starting over both financially and emotionally if this happens. How do you get over almost 3 decades ? How do you start your life again in your mid 50s ?
Feeling lost and hopeless at the moment.
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Oh yes, loneliness! I know it all too well. I ended a relationship of five years that was going nowhere, not because I wanted to but because we were two very different people. The toxicity of it exacerbated my already fragile Mental state and he had issues that he didn't want to admit to, he was totally dependent on me for his every need and at the end of it, he was so very much delusional that he believed he did it all himself. He had to go and that was that.
I don't know the ins and outs of your situation but sometimes things that we do not want to face and decisions that we do not want to accept are probably for the best in the long run. Surely you must have felt some burden having to carry around her emotional baggage. Its okay to admit this, we are only human at the end of the day. I don't know about you but i am using this valuable time on my own to rediscover who I really am whilst at the same time looking after myself emotionally, mentally and physically.