Quote:
Originally Posted by SlumberKitty
I work full time. It's hard because I have Schizoaffective disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, and panic attacks. I took half a day off last Friday. I took part of the day off last Wednesday to go to the Urgent Care for self harm. I am taking part of this Wednesday off to go to my primary for the follow up from the Urgent care.
My work is pretty cool and they don't seem to mind when I take off work and I always use PTO so it's not like a big deal. But I feel bad about it sometimes. Like I am not being a good employee.
Lately work has been really difficult. The last week or so, I think because I am in a pretty severe depressive episode. Not really sure how to get out of it. I thought about asking to cut my hours but then I would have to try to figure out how to cut my bills down and that would be difficult. I don't even know if working less would help. I do pretty good with routine. But sometimes my job doesn't have a lot of work for me to do and then it is easy to get stuck in negative thinking about myself or something.
It's just hard.
Kit
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I'm sorry things have been hard for you lately.
When you say it's easy to get stuck in negative thinking when your job doesn't have a lot of work for you to do, is there any way to combat that negative thinking? I know it's easier said than done. I'm sure though that maybe you can figure out ways to stop ruminating (if that's what you want to call it).
I lately have been putting a rubber band around my wrist and snapping it whenever I feel distressed emotionally. I know, it seems absurd, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
Anyway, I hope you feel better soon.
I'm sure it would probably help your self-image to continue your full-time work. But there's no shame in cutting back on hours. At least know that no one's judging you for that.
Also, that's what PTO is there for. They obviously value you as an employee. You're good at your job!
Hoping you will feel better soon.