I'm a pessimist. Or at least I used to be. I read this quote, and the first time I read it, it meant nothing. Then I reread it today, and it was as if I dumped a ton of garbage off my shoulders. I'm posting it in case it helps someone else. I think realism is the best - not optimism or pessimism. And I know that the feeling I have now won't last, but I think my life will be a lot happier for a long time. Here's the quote:

"It is more prudent to be a pessimist. It is an insurance against disappointment, and no one can say “I told you so,” which is how the prudent condemn the optimist. The essence of optimism is that it takes no account of the present, but it is a source of inspiration, of vitality and hope where others have resigned; it enables a man to hold his head high, to claim the future for himself and not to abandon it to his enemy. Of course there is a foolish, shifty kind of optimism which is rightly condemned. But the optimism which is will for the future should never be despised, even if it is proved wrong a hundred times. It is the health and vitality which a sick man should never impugn. Some men regard it as frivolous, and some Christians think it is irreligious to hope and prepare oneself for better things to come in this life. They believe in chaos, disorder and catastrophe. That, they think, is the meaning of the present events and in sheer resignation or pious escapism they surrender all responsibility for the preservation of life and for the generations yet unborn. Tomorrow may be the day of judgement. If it is, we shall gladly give up working for a better future, but not before."

~ Bonhoeffer, Dietrich. 1939/1953. Letters and Papers from Prison, originally published as Prisoner for God. Edited by Eberhard Bethge; translated by Reginald H. Fuller. New York, Macmillian, pp. 32-33.