This is just trying to understand a friend's behavior when we go out in public into a restaurant (for example). Partly, I don't like what happened. Parly, I am trying to understand why it happens.
So - guess I'm just asking for other points of view - to understand, and how to respond - carefully.
We went out for lunch, it was later in the afternoon, so only a few other people were even in the restaurant. The waitress was a young woman, who was very enthusiastic about the menu selections, and very friendly (long blonde hair) and quite talkative.
As the meal progressed - my friend then started to ask her personal questions (about her studies, etc). Then he started talking to her about some of my concerns (which took me quite by surprise, and I did not like this because I don't tend to discuss my personal concerns with a total stranger). I do not know why he did this.
Then he continued involving her in our lunch time (again - something that I did not really like very much - because, although I am willing to be friendly, I really didn't go out for lunch to spend the time with her).
As we were leaving, he continued talking to her - telling him about his own past of not having completed his education. I don't know why he would start saying these things about himself. I found it was becoming embarrassing - and to hear him say these things reminded me of when he has told me that he feels like a failure (because of not finishing his education, etc). The result is that I am now again feeling kind of sorry for him - that he has to go around saying this to strangers. And I wouldn't want the waitress to follow his example - of not finishing one's education (I am thinking of him as a poor role model right now - in regard to this enthusiastic young woman who is in pursuing her education).
How could I have responded to him and to her - during lunch while this kind of interaction was occurring.
He has done things similar to this in the past. Almost ignoring me while he carries on a lengthy conversation with someone else in the restaraunt, and it doesn't end, it goes on and on, I eventually go back and forth to the washroom to figure out what next to do. I finally decided that I would just walk away. And then it's up to him to either carry on his conversation with someone else, or realize that I am leaving the scene.
Why does he do this? Is he trying to make more friends? Is he looking for listeners? Is he bored with me? Is he trying to pick her up? Is he just being sociable wherever he goes? Am I over-reacting?