RD you don’t have to change your values as a person. Toxic people do and say things hoping to bait you into behaving badly. Often they say things that are more about themselves. You just have to develop the way you listen and realize how they reveal themselves as they fault you or others.

I see it all the time and have noticed those who fail to see what’s really being said. This is especially true when a person has a problem with alcohol and is in denial.

It’s not you that is not enough, it’s the personality of the person that is never satisfied just like the disease of alcoholism/addiction in one drink is not enough. There is exaggerating involved in this mindset of not enough.