Rest for me is trying to let go of the present stress/anxiety/depression...whatever is controlling me at the moment. I deliberately tell myself that I need to put this away in a box for the rest of the night. I literally did it last night because I was waiting on an email response from my job, and knew it wouldn't be until today.

I have to take off another week of work because my feet are not improving. This is a MONTH of not getting paid, and having to pay for doctor's appointments and medications. I am relieved I don't have to work, but it is extremely stressful, financially. I also called my boss earlier to just check in and tell her how awful I feel that she has been scrambling for a month to fill my position in the classroom. It is NOT easy, and I bet she has been in the room with them. I also miss my babies.

I was supposed to follow up with the ortho doc on April 19th, 6 weeks from my first visit. I was supposed to start work next week, and would have had to work in extreme pain for another few weeks just to tell the doctor my pain hasn't improved despite everything I've been trying. When I saw my doctor yesterday, she said she would call their office to see if they can move my appointment up. I had tried, but they said I had to wait the 6 weeks. Well apparently doctors have more authority, because I am now seeing him Friday morning.

I hardly can believe this is my life. My apartment is a ***** hole, and yet I do nothing to clean it.