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I can't express anything like that. Our oldest took a lot of anger from his mom. Anything I say, such as that I miss her, or wish things were different, or anything, of the kind results in him becoming quiet and distant. We talked a long time last night. He very much needs someplace safe to attach to, and a safe person who won't make him feel like he is second place
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When you show him that you may give in and put the blinders on again about your wife your son feels invalidated. All your children are afraid of your wife. They need you to see THEIR reality so they can feel safe.
Your wife is creating the same environment she grew up in.
Believe me, you do not want your children escaping painful emotions through alcohol and drugs.
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