Hi all. I would like to ask for some other perspectives if anyone is willing to share:

Somebody said to me that people can recover completely and 100% from trauma, if they decide to let go and move on. They said ‘you are not being abused now, but you keep going over and over the wound, so you are keeping the wound open’.
They were using ‘you’ in a generic kind of way; but still there were only two people in the room, and they were speaking to me! So it felt personal.

In a way, I can see it what they were getting at - the idea that we can get ‘stuck’ in a helpless or a compulsive way, going over the same trauma over and over again even though we have physically escaped from the situation. But I don’t think anyone can blame anyone for that - maybe that needs to happen for some people, we can’t always know their whole journey and where they are at…

At the same time it really upset me. First of all, the person was saying that it is possible to be completely healed and never be upset or disturbed by the trauma that one has been though ever again. I don’t know whether that is possible for a one-off trauma, but my own experience is of long-term complex trauma (dx complex ptsd), and I definitely don’t think it’s possible. I DO know that it’s possible to recover hugely and have a really good and fulfilled and happy life - I am hugely grateful that this has been my experience. But I also think it’s totally unrealistic to think that never ever again will anything awaken the pain and the trauma which has been such a huge part of one’s formative experience. To me, it feels almost re-traumatising, because it feels like being blamed for one’s trauma.

Would anyone share any thoughts about this? I would be interested to see others’ perspectives! Thank you in advance!