Ok, first of all a therapist should not be telling a child that age to smoke pot. If your child is severely depressed then she should see a psychiatrist to see what medication might help.

You are not a failure. You are doing the best you can given your circumstances. Age 14 is a challenge in different ways. Is she a freshman in high school? If so, freshman year is the hardest year. Also that’s probably been further complicated due to how Covid really disrupted and isolated children. This has led to many children struggling with depression and anxiety. Also many have fallen way behind with their school work and many are barely passing which has been bad for self esteem.

Children need structure and activity and socializing. Any normal challenges have been magnified due to Covid. So please know that you are not the only parent dealing with a lost depressed child.

Do you live near a horse farm? Maybe your daughter can look into donating her time helping to groom horses. Maybe you have an animal rescue near you? Never underestimate the therapeutic power of animals. It’s worth looking into.

It’s ok to feel, just make sure you are not feeding into negative feelings.

Glad you managed to muster up strength to share. ((Comforting caring hugs)).