On strip clubs . . . For whatever reason, going out to strip clubs as a group is not uncommon as a male activity. I know, for instance, that my brother-in-law did this on occasion with his work buddies when he was younger, and there is not a more decent, honorable man than my brother-in-law. I am pretty sure my husband did the same when he was young, and he was my husband for 34 years. So, much may depend on the context (group socializing vs. individual).

I’m glad to read you are slowing yourself down. Just take the time to get to know this guy. You don’t have to know everything NOW if you are willing to just let things develop, or not, at a natural pace. Trying to get all the answers now may seem pushy or desperate for commitment at a time when you two can just take the time to learn each other at a more organic pace.