Grief.. fills my heart... and I know there is no one that will understand.... how could anyone???

I ended my 27 year old friendship.. this past week... and I am in great mourning...there is such grief.. this person.. I have known.. most of my adult life...

I know.. you say.. this person is still alive.. so why the grief.. and why not repair the friendship..

I can't... and this person is closer than any sib.. could be.. yet.. to allow such a destructive force into my life... means I will never recover from my eating disorder...it is so complex.. how could I ever explain..

I think.. I could pass... just from a broken heart....