AND.... I am VERY happy that Jay asked me about him being able to visit again on Tue - I wanted HIM to bring it up first and I didn't want to initiate.. I wanted him to initiate, and he did. He brought it up, so I said yes.

I also told him about the dude in Oregon who also used to scream at me and chase me around his house.... just like my ex husband did. Jay noted that and asked if my father had done something to me as a child.....

initially, I said, no, nothing like that, which is true because my father never yelled at me and we did not grow up in a yelling or screaming type of household... but he did ask, and now I feel I should tell him that my father essentially was emotionally abusive to me..... and that that's how I ended up in several abusive relationships. I didn't really mean to talk about this with him so early on, but it just came out within the context of our conversation about my travels out west several years ago.

Oh man... I am almost afraid to tell him that I had been abused.... not sure I want this history known so early on. But I feel I should tell him a bit more about my father since he did ask. It's uncomfortable for me to talk about with someone new and so soon.... Maybe I'll just let it go for now and won't follow up on it until we get to know each other better.

Maybe I'll curb the abuse stories for now.... there's so many of them. I really don't know what to tell Jay about this aspect of my relationship history? The stories just naturally occur and come up in conversation. What do I do?