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Simpdonny said:
Can this be possible?
Alright, I'm in my thirties; not too old to realize that these disorders are real identities to a bundle of functions a person carries, but not too young to feel that it carries the stigma of copping out of the responsibility of organization and being active mentally and physically.
Before I digress further, back to the question. Given the concerns and background thoughts of ADD and ADHD, I have found more traits in common than not to this disorder and cannot avoid questioning whether I'm just being a lazy bum, hypochondrical bum I should say; or, is there more merit and perhaps a path to reign in my overactive mind, focusing it on the task at hand, life.
My brother and I exhibit the same traits; but, are not intellectually on the same level. I'm not saying that I am more intelligent or that he is less, but we each are savants in separate, different areas with little overlap, if any. For the longest time, I figured that we were manic-depressive or at least were borderline in that regard. I turn the depression and anger inward until my thoughts are too loud. My Brother exerts his anger often without thinking.

How can we identify what is relevant and singular, given that he and I relate to ADD/ADHD?
Secondly, he and I are in our early thirties; I being younger than he by three years. We have aspirations of grandeur which, I fear, an official diagnosis would or could jeopardize these paths. How do I address this... I fear diagnosis. I fear I have this, but somehow moving forward with getting help will make it more real and more controlling on what I can or cannot accomplish.

Any thoughts are appreciated.

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Nothing you stated here is particular to ADHD (ADHD is the diagnostic term; ADD is the old term).

What specific symptoms do you have that you consider to be indicative of ADHD?

Laziness is pretty meaningless diagnostically speaking, and isn't an "ADHD trait." This is a part of the stereotype that ADHD gets in the media.
However, feeling as though you are lazy however could be due to procrastination--another common behavior that isn't a diagnostic symptom of ADHD either, but many ADHDers do at least outwardly appear to be procrastinating whether they are or not; however this is not specific to ADHD either.

I understand your fear of a label, and I understand the fear of stigmatization, but you do know that just because you see a psychiatrist or a psychologist, it doesn't mean you have to go around telling everybody; in fact, I recommend against doing that--- not because it's shameful, but because many people are ignorant, and also because its no ones business but yours what your health record says. If you do have ADHD, it is far worse to let it go untreated and wreaking havoc in your life, than it is to seek treatment. The first step in this is to make an appointment with a clinical psychologist who has experience in ADHD treatment and assessment in adults (I never recommend seeing a psychiatrist for diagnosis). It's important to rule out other things that could account for your distress too, and they do that when they assess you. If you pay out of pocket, no one could find out unless you tell them; but it will likely be expensive, so only if you have money to spare would I recommend that route.

Your brother has got to make his own decisions regarding seeking help; that is, if he thinks he has a problem and wants to seek help for it. Maybe it would work best if you went first, and that might encourage him to go. If it is ADHD, when you get proper treatment, it's like turning on a lightbulb, and everything gets clearer... it's not magic, but the longer in treatment for ADHD, the better it gets over time.

There are very few employment categories that will be destroyed by a diagnosis of ADHD or anything else. I would say that it is something to consider dealing with after you take care of yourself first.
Don't worry about ADHD too much-- it's quite a GIFT when its under control.
BEST OF LUCK TO YOU@!!!!!!