Dear T,

Thank you. For trying new things. For adapting your style of therapy more to suit my messed up brain. I really do appreciate it. I am going to make you a card to say thank you. This is one hell of a rollercoaster isn't it. I am sure I did warn you when we started! By deciding to leave I am now finding myself wanting to stay. I'm not surprised, because I have been through this push/pull before, I just wish I didn't make it so difficult. I wonder if I could have just politely asked you to try working more creatively? I wonder if that would have 'worked'? Did I do that? I don't think I did. No, instead I was all triggered by that terrible session and decided leaving was the only option I had! Oh silly me.

Today was tough, but in a really productive way. There's no way I would have said those two words unless we had done what we did, I know that, and I'm pleased that together we found a way, but it didn't stop me feeling like a baby learning to talk. And whilst I do appreciate the constant "well done"s and the "you are doing so well" it can feel a little patronising at times! I don't want you to stop though!!

Anyway, yeah, thanks for hearing me and for finding other ways, it means a lot and is really helpful!!