I have no job, no school, no direction. Sometimes I wonder if the reason I have no direction is because of my condition. Or maybe I just don't care. I mean, I have a belief that everything in my life depends on the medication I am on. If I were not on medication, my life would be in shambles - so to speak.

I remember having all kinds of ideas and theories when I was on a very low dose of Zyprexa. Now I am on 30mg. I just keep telling myself that things will get better. I have been fully medication compliant for almost six consecutive years now. And things still have not actually gotten better. I have no focus, no passion/aspiration for anything. Is this normal?