Hello!! It sounds like you're in a really tough situation with your toxic mother. It's not fair for her to demand an apology from you without offering one herself, and then threaten to kick you out of the house if you express any negative feelings. It's also concerning that she's always focused on having "peace" in the house, which suggests that she's not addressing the underlying issues in a healthy way. It's understandable that you're angry and frustrated with the situation, and it's important to prioritize your own emotional well-being. If you're not comfortable visiting your parents right now, it's okay to take some time for yourself and set boundaries with your mother. It may also be helpful to seek support from a therapist or trusted friend or family member.