I find myself having moments of great despair. Where I wonder what the point of it all is. The whole of humanity looks rather silly and pathetic. I think we should be wiped off this earth. There’s just a fruitlessness to existence. I get a great empty hole in my soul and miss mum. Then it passes. We are just temporary visitors to earth. This morning it all seemed pointless. I canceled aqua fitness because what’s the point. Then Sir came and laid on me. He makes it better. I guess that’s grief. Experiencing grief in a stable place is new for me. I don’t have to let it drag me down.