Grief can be very hard...but it helps with healing and moving forward...
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I always felt like I was overwhelmed, like I was in over my head, like I needed someone to take some of my responsibilities from me, like I needed someone almost to save me. That feeling is greatly reduced, practically gone these days.
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When you live with someone who has an alcohol use disorder, and/or strongly narcissistic traits, you are informed every day that you are not good enough. Every day.
When you are freed of that person, you can start to realize "Hey, I can actually do stuff! Maybe I am good enough after all!"
You always could do stuff, and you always were good enough, but being told the opposite daily, by someone close, insidiously tends to make you start to believe the opposite...