My boyfriend has been saying he needs some space for awhile now. Time to see friends, family, and be alone. With hard work and medication, I've been able to let him go a lot more lately. I used to panic, hurt myself, stay up all night crying, you name it, when he was gone - I had a ridiculous dependence on him.

Now I don't go through that anymore, but of course I don't feel perfect: Other than my relationship with him, I'm pretty isolated and spend most of my time alone. Lately, I've been feeling so lonely, depressed, anxious, and sick to my stomach from all of the emotions. Luckily their in control.

I haven't been telling him about how I've been feeling, because I know if he knows I'm not feeling well, he will feel guilty and will be unhappy. So he's been getting his time alone, and I'm proud of letting him go. But it hurts. I'm not telling him because I want him to keep feeling good and not feel guilty anymore, but we used to be so open in our relationship: we talked about everything we were feeling. Now I feel like I've closed up to him.

I know that in relationships, its really important to have open and honest communication about feelings and issues that pop up. But I've also heard that when men start withdrawing like he has (he used to be all over me, wanting to spend every moment together - gosh, it was even a little too much for me!), its important to give them the space they want. Not to give more time and attention to them than they are giving to you; because if you do, they'll feel guilty.

What should I do? It seems like these two things contradict each other.