Quote:
Originally Posted by nonightowl
I'm not familiar with rbf but looked it up and it seems to mean, in this context, "resting b i t c h face"?  Sorry, NOT calling you one, just writing what I found online.
I've met some nice people in groups before but they ghosted me eventually. They weren't what they seemed, I conclude. You're so right how loud people dominate everything because they are so loud. Or long winded types. My in person book club is like that. The loud people dominate the conversation the whole hour, some people I don't hear from at all. It's like one would have to stand on the table and yell "Will you all SHUT UP and give others a chance?"
You've made a good post. I too have been accused of being too needy simply by making a friendly gesture. Or they think it's not sincere. I'm ALWAYS sincere and say what I mean, mean what I say.
When I was a kid I used to get berated for being quiet, like there's something wrong with that. NOW I dare anyone to say that to me, as I'd say why are they so loud? Or why do they talk so much if they ask me why I never talk? Who says it's acceptable to be loud and not acceptable to be quiet?
The world is for the extroverted. And to add to my distress, I don't have a loud voice and wearing a mask in the past made it that much harder to be heard. So being heard just literally was hard enough.
Like you I'm not making much effort anymore. I don't mean I'm stopping completely but being more careful than I was, seeing what kind of vibe I get from the person. That inner voice has usually been right, so I'm now wary of anyone else TOO eager to be a friend. I did get this "red flag" feeling from someone who really laid it on thick, such as how glad she met me, how I'm so great, that she made a new friend, we can still talk/text if not going for a walk, etc. etc. etc. Recommending books to me, saying she liked the same TV shows I liked, etc.
I don't know....in hindsight I think I was a guinea pig of some kind. She's studying psychology so maybe it was to see if I took the bait. I did, unfortunately.
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lol, I know that you’re not calling me the b word, lol. Anyways, it’s nice to know that I’m not the only person with this issue. Real friends & genuine people are extremely difficult to find these days.
There are a ton of self absorbed selfish users out there. A lot of women only seem to be there for theur femske friends when they’re single or for when their boyfriend’s & husbands are busy & not available for them, ugh!
I have nothing but bad luck with 99% of single women that I meet. I think they are all very jealous of me. Especially the ones who struggle to make ends meet.
That sucks that they can’t be happy for other people. Their whole world revolves around the boyfriend or whoever they’re dating at the moment. So lame!
They drop everything even for rude flaky guys. Pathetic!
I’ll never ever give women like that a chance again. I’m sure that one lady who pretended to want to see pics from a recent trip blocked me on insta. I can’t find her period.
She has a new boyfriend now. Weird! Why pretend to want to see my pics then block me? lol. I just don’t get a lot of people.
I think that a lot of people base their so called ‘friendship’ on what they can get out of you at the moment be it attention, validation, time, favors, money, status, rides, etc….
Next time I encounter a rude self absorbed perdon, I’ll fkat out yell them exactly why I don’t want to talk to them again!
I’ll say, I can’t be friends with people who only want to talk about themselves & not even bother to ask me one single question to their face, lol!
Eff being polite! lol! They don’t deserve my kindness or respect, lol! I’d lobe to have a friend like you btw. I’m an introvert too.