My Support Forums - View Single Post - Why did all my new friends start ignoring me? Are they jealous?

nonightowl · Apr 06, 2023, 12:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Motts

Hi nonnightowl I did delete my post. I tend to blather on LOL and felt like I was being repetitive.

What I did post about was the fact that people's priorities and interests have everything to do with how they treat other people. If the OP's priorities and interests aren't aligned with these women friends', of course they're going to clash personality-wise.

I don't agree with anyone who promotes the privileged (and very misguided) assumption, "It's not about you." Um. Yes it is. That's why we have stigmas and stereotypes and biases. It's always about the 'you.' (The other person)

People are judgmental and mean and biased. There's no denying it, because it's a fact. And, there's no denying that people's treatment of you is based on their perception of you.

If someone likes and respects you, they treat you that way. If they don't like you and don't respect you, then they mistreat you.

The whole assumption that people's priorities and interests are a reflection of them and not the other person, I just don't agree with at all.

Thanks, whew! I thought I'm seeing things, lol.

You're right in that when people treat someone that way, they do not like or respect them. Real friendship isn't that at all.

I do think that when they say "It's not you, it's them", it's true, only in the sense that when someone ghosts a person, it is about THEIR immaturity or lack of courage or communication skills or whatnot. It's also that they don't care enough about the other person to be honest and choosing to ghost instead.

It's true everyone has stuff on their plate, but I agree with you that a REAL friend MAKES time for you. That bs about "I've been busy" is just that, bs. They CAN take the time for you and they would, even if to SAY it's been crazy but they are still thinking about you and wanting to check in.