What you both are describing has been affecting you as a response to the mood swings of individuals that have a disorder where they experience fluctuating moods and they are self medicating with alcohol and developed AUD. The AUD in and of itself has fluctuating moods depending on how much alcohol is in the person’s system.

When you live with someone that is like this it can become very disabling and you slowly become a codependent living your life around their mood swings. Codependency involves your nervous system and you start to get actual physical reactions, even in your adrenal system. And an unhealthy person like this can slowly get you to believe this unbalance is your fault and that you are the one that has the problem.

You cannot fix a person that is disordered and this includes the additional AUD. These individuals require professional help for both the AUD and the underlying disorder they are trying to self medicate.

Yes, it can be heart breaking. It’s very bad for children who are subjected to unpredictable mood swings that also affect their nervous systems. Chances of a child also developing problems is high. Children do not have the life skills or maturity to understand.