Quote:
Originally Posted by blueparakeet78
I always wanted to be successful at something. To be a professional in a field, an authority in a subject, or an expert at doing something. But never in my life could I pick a specific field that said to me 'that is what I want to devote my entire life to'. I always look at those successful people, and I'm so jealous. I wanted to be that person but I don't feel like I ever will. And in fact it's gotten to the point where I've completely given up on trying.
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Most of the people I know who are really excellent and respected in their fields just sort of landed in those positions due to a fortuitous combination of education/preparation and talent. One friend who is a respected academic in humanities simply went to a very high-level high school which left him with extremely strong Latin and Greek - so he went with it. He did, however, have a talent for languages. Another colleague was a very annoying kid who never wanted to study, but had great talent for math - his parents forced him to study and develop his mathematical talent, and again, he's now a very respected academic in biochemistry.
I didn't know what I wanted to do, but in my early 20s I had to figure something out for myself so I went with computers. I'd always liked computers--that was all the reasoning behind the decision. I took a few random C++ classes at a local college, ended up getting my degree in compsci, ended up getting a masters in compsci, ended up getting a phd, etc. But it all started with those C++ courses I took part-time at that no-name college.
You don't necessarily need to know exactly what you want, but you do need enough of a direction to start building your foundation. Being an "expert in a field" means having a solid foundation in something and expanding from there. The harder the field you choose is, the less competition - so pick the hardest thing you think you can feasibly do and then start small, for example by building up your college credits. This path takes maturity and patience - once on it, you can't change your mind and drop everything to strike off in a different direction.
I've had several friends who were smart and talented and could have done almost anything they wanted with their lives, but because they were never able to actually decide what they wanted to do, they ended up drifting for decades. Avoid that at all costs, even if it means choosing something "randomly." In the end, most of what happens in people's lives is random and that's true too for people who seem exceptional.
You might also like to read Malcolm Gladwell's "Outliers." It might help you change some aspects of your perspective.
Good luck!