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Originally Posted by divine1966
Obviously it was more than 250k because if each boy got 180 or what not. He supposedly had zero money and could not even give you 1 K for the chair.
Listen he owes you that money. For expensive wedding and honeymoon that you paid for solely, like literally unheard of be honest, he never paid even a half let alone more that that. He bought a ring, but that’s what men always do. Wedding and engagement rings don’t fall into mutual expense. And jerk paid for it with ex wife’s money. He owes you. You endlessly spent on him.
Enough with this “I must be nice”. You must be civil in public. What’s this with being nice?
In addition moving out in the middle of lease puts undue burden on the one who stays. He owes for that too. You gave him back a deposit which he used on drugs last year. He can pay it back.
The way it needs to be worded. “You owed me money and now with these how many thousands you give me now we are in the clear, thanks for paying back”. Remain polite. No you do not need to accept calls or otherwise go out of your way at all for the duration of your life.
These niceties gets you no where. What is it to do with you dating or running into him. So now you must suffer because you are afraid he’ll say something to someone? To whom? Who cares? Yes it will be clean break. Dude put you through too much. Take the money and bye Felicia. That’s your clean break
Where does it get you in life with this “must be nice to men”. You shouldn’t be uncivil. But nice? why?
Also he is now offering 10k in a hurry because he figured you are addressing it with a lawyer and judge and likely will get more money from him. So he figured out 10k will shut you up in a hurry and you won’t ask for more in court. The guy is manipulative jerk treating you like you are stupid and you still “must be nice”. No
Take the money or fight for more
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Yes, theoretically, he owes me. But when I've brought it up in that way to him, he has become extremely defensive and argumentative, telling me that he spent thousands of dollars on us while we were together, so in his mind, it all cancels out. He's wrong, but I refuse to continue to argue the point with him.
I'd much rather receive the money through legal means than freely accepting it from him in this way. I know myself... and I know that as a result, IF I accept this money now, I will feel obligated to be nice, to accept his calls and texts and to speak with him whenever I run into him. It's who and how I am, and I cannot change that.
No... the answer is unequivocally NO. I will not take 10K from him. Not in this way. I see it as yet another way to manipulate and control me and I won't allow it.
The other day after he lit into me and berated me on the phone, I told him over text that I never wish to speak or hear from him again. I told him he has NOT changed, and that he is an abusive mother fu*cker.
I will eat all my words if I accept money from him in this way. The only way I would accept money is if it came from a legal standpoint.
I must break free of him and for good.